LJ Idol: Twists, Nerves and Thoughts

[bewize]

So the contestants had to nominate people all this week. The mods picked the top four nominations and have put them in charge of picking tribes for the next few weeks.

This means that IF I survive this vote, the tribes will be changing again. It also means that one of the four top votes will have to ask for me in their tribe (or maybe tribe 5 is everyone who didn't get picked...). *lol*

I'm really nervous about this vote. I reread my post and liked it, but I'm not sure it's strong enough to push me into next week. I will undoubtedly be back to ask for votes from you lovely people later (presuming that non-participants are able to vote this week).

For a game, this thing causes me a lot of stress.

That made me think, last night, about why it causes me stress. I think it's several reasons. One, I don't normally put my writing out and allow a "vote" of like or dislike to persuade me of much.

I've churned out tens of thousands of words of fiction for public consumption, and felt not even a tiny bit as nervous as I do when I put up these entries. I mean, I look forward to and enjoy feedback as much as any author does. I don't get paid, so hearing what someone thought is seriously a high all of its own. For these entries, though, it's a little different. This isn't fiction. It's my life. I guess part of me feels like people are voting not only on my writing skills, but on my life.

It makes responding to comments hard, too, because I find myself inferring things that likely were not implied. In other words, I need to get a grip.

But it was interesting to me at least, so I thought I'd share my thoughts.

Comments

Chill, Winston!

[readinggypsy.livejournal.com]

You are a great writer. Unlike many, you write with an authentic and distinguishable voice. I really hope that you look into publishing some of your writings. I would love to read more by you, if you care to share them with me. Relax and just enjoy doing something you know you are good at. The rest will come. At least, that's how I think about my life's work.

Re: Chill, Winston!

[bewize.livejournal.com]

Thank you, darlin'. *grins*

I am trying to polish up some short stories to submit to fiction magazines (as soon as I finish this next trial, anyway), so if you're interested, I'll send some to you for your thoughts. :)

As for worrying, hey! That's what I do. :D It would be ... unnatural if I didn't.

you write with an authentic and distinguishable voice

I just have to say that this is the nicest compliment I've gotten! I worry that I sound "fake" or overly orchestrated when I write and I don't want to do that at all. I'm really glad you think I sound authentic. And distinguishable is always excellent!

*hugs*

Pot Calling the Kettle Black

[catwomyn5.livejournal.com]

People would not tell you that you are a great writer if you were in fact NOT a great writer. I don't blow smoke up your ass when I complement your work and say you should become an author. I would not degrade you by lying to you about that! You know I hate lying in any form. Not to mention I suck at it.

On the feeling stressed about sharing your life part. I can see why that would worry you. You aren't a terribly open person when it comes to personal things. Generally you give little bits of something different to everyone so no one knows everything, its just how you work. This project however is something different, you are telling a LOT of folks about parts of your life and getting voted on those entries. While they aren't judging you or your life just the way your write about your life events, I can see why it would be stressful. Sure, makes sense. BUT, you are writing and they are judging not you personally but giving their very subjective opinion about your short entry on one topic. It means nothing about who you are or how loveable and wonderful a person you are...they might just like stories about mushrooms better than elevators. *shrug*

If I were doing this exercise I would ABSOLUTELY react the way you are reacting. Hence, I am too chicken. :)

Re: Pot Calling the Kettle Black

[chix001.livejournal.com]

Excellent way of putting things. I agree.

[chix001.livejournal.com]

I can definitely see why you fret over this and feel like people might be voting on your life. THe scrapbooking publishing/design world is very similar (you and your families' memories are pretty much on display/available for judgment). It's no wonder why lots of women have chosen to publish only the inane pages and not anything real about their lives. I wouldn't

But I do admire that you are doing this, and I think you're much, much better than you give yourself credit for. You are one of the few people to whom I can just listen- no matter the topic- and your writing style is very similar to how you speak and I feel the same way about it.